This is where it all begun

Most of us in a relationship would attest to being afraid of that one thing, that one phone call requesting you to pass by the supermarket and fetch a product you have either never ever heard of or are completely clueless as to which shelf it would be on. Yes my day came and I received that call from Bae..

Phone rings   Bea: hi sweetie

Me: Hi

Bae: Please be a darling and bring me some Bell pepper on the way home.

Me: Ok boo, I got your back

Bea: You are just the best .. mwahhh

“Click.. the phone call was over and here I was having setup myself for a sure failure and a lot of embarrassment in the process because all I heard was what and where ( the rest I would figure out once I got there). A quick turn here and there on Langata road and there I was peeking through my tinted windows trying to spot a parking lot in the dark basement of a well known mall that hosts a well known supermarket.   It took only a short time of 10 long minutes and a few honks and flashing of headlights to finally get a parking spot. I was a darling to my Bae and couldn’t be anything less of the superhuman she had envisioned me to be ( the one who knew what bell pepper was ).   With the confidence of a dog in its backyard, I went into the supermarket browsing through the spices shelves, reading every tag and label looking for Bell pepper. I eventually moved to the vegetables section and it didn’t take long before I realized I was a misfit in this section..i was picking a vegetable looking for the label and putting it back, I continued through this grueling process with sneers and heart melting stares “zile za who sent you” I tried my level best amidst of trolley pains that kids (who were being taught a lessons in adult hood which included painfully pushing the trolleys through me and constantly being reminded to “sema pole”.

After 45 minutes of searching I finally did the “manly” thing and went looking for wale wase wako na uniform (floor managers) it didn’t take too long to get the attention of one.. “ niaje chief ( chiefs were highly respected people and held in high esteem back in the village I came from) and so when I called my fellow villager this name reserved for a few, he was more than delighted to help me out. “ natafuta Bell pepper, do you know where I can get it? He stroked his hairless chin in deep thought like as if he was trying to remember a bad debtor. Then he did the Kenyan thing.. “ hiyo iko upstairs, infact I think zilikuja  jana new stock, Checki tu hapo karibu na baby section”   With this I thanked the chief and bolted upstairs, while there I started wondering why girlfriend would send me for a baby product and I knew she wasn’t… or was she? But we didn’t… ahh it’s probably for my niece.. so the search continued. I realized that I had spent more than an hour searching for this elusive product (at this point of realization I was looking at Men’s shoes) and thus decided to just leave and tell her they were out of stock since it was end month and the shopping frenzy as she knows…   I made my way down the stairs to the exit to pay for parking which at this point didn’t make sense as I had not benefited in any way from my shopping experience.

I get to the queue at the parking booth which became even longer because one of the other machines wasn’t working and even at this frustrating point in time “parents “ still wanted to teach their kids the responsibilities of paying for parking “ daddy don’t put the coin here put the coin here, not that coin the other coin the yellow one.. Where is it? Then I see someone trying to perform a magic act to make the coin appear from the tiny pockets of the imported jeans the kid was wearing and checked the tiny hands twice to confirm that indeed the young man had not have pulled a fast one… in this frustrating moment when the person behind you starts to murmur something in the native tongue my default reaction was to get my phone and start reading something. Its at this point that I remember a still small voice (my conscience) say Google is your friend… ahh yes let me check whether this Bell pepper is a real thing or maybe it was a rouse to just get a good laugh out of me (she occasionally is weird like that)   When the results were shown (and no they were not preliminary results) it showed something I could relate to “ hoho” my elusive quest and time wasted was in search for “hoho, yani green pepper ama Capsicum” This was the shock of my life (not really the Arsenal 8-2 thrashing to Man united is still top) all this time I .. i was annoyed A: at my girlfriend for referring to a product using its scientific name and expecting that by some miracle I would decipher that B: the chief (floor managers) how do you not know that someone like me would be sent to buy something with a scientific name? You should know all the alternative names of the products on your shelves C: Google, why didn’t Google already have a smart app that could decode such communication before or immediately after that phone call?   But now that I know I must still prove that I’m that guy who gets her completely and was able to know what bell pepper is (I’m a genius amongst many men that have failed in this quest) with the coin drama still on going I slipped back into the supermarket did my quick shopping, queued for a good 15 minutes to just pay for 3 vegetables, went on my second queue to pay for parking which at this point was more expensive than my shopping, went into the haunting basement found that some Kenyans had left trolleys behind my car like as if it was a surprise gift for me to tow along. I quickly put my shopping in the car, pushed the convoy of trolleys into the respective cart corrals (bet you didn’t know that’s the name for where carts / trolleys are kept or in my case supposed to be kept)   Upon exiting I parked on the side and ordered for fresh sugar cane juice to avoid road rage due to my low sugar levels after 2 hour in the supermarket. It took a few minutes after that and I was welcomed home with a warm embrace and 100mw smile. She being a Kenyan asked traffic was bad? And I just nodded in agreement because I couldn’t really tell her of my frustrating shopping ordeal.   Later that evening I couldn’t help but think how many men and women have gone through a similar experience and what help or solution is there for us? With a pen and paper in hand, the year 2016 the month of June, Emart Kenya Limited was conceived. It took a lot of hard work, research and dedication including investing our wedding funds on it to create such a business and serve the people who would appreciate such services i.e. Men, the elderly, the sick, expecting mothers and many other people that would rather be doing something better in the few hours of a Saturday afternoon than spend the better part of it in a supermarket as well as the Scopophobic (people that are afraid of being looked at) most celebrities have this disorder and thus the hoods, hats and dark glasses.   Since Launching in February 2017 we have managed to service 609 orders and save lots of our customers including my self and now my fiancée almost wife (7 weeks to go Yay !!! ) the hustles of shopping.  Bell pepper was the first product I uploaded on the platform and is now available on www.e-mart.co.ke, to me this is just not a vegetable but the inspiration behind revolutionizing how people shop and better yet how to create a feel good shopping experience for everyone.   To my fiancée I love you Bigly and I’m forever grateful that you chose me, to bell pepper thank you, you are truly an inspirational vegetable.